Step 1: Learn to say "No."
Part of saying no is simply being honest with yourself about your needs and your feelings. Instead of making excuses or
saying you "can't" do something, simply say you won't do it. When you feel like you lack the time to relax, take stock
of your true priorities and say no, politely, to the excess demands. Think back when you didn't have a cell phone and
what you did then. You don't have to please everyone. If you have kids demanding your resources, trade them for their
own resources, such as "I will help you by driving you to the mall, if you help me make dinner when we get home."
Step 2: Care for your physical body.
Remember that your body is a system of resources that you consume. When you do not replenish these resources
sufficiently—by eating healthful foods, getting full rest at night, drinking enough water to flush out waste products,
etc.—you are consuming and shortening your life.
Small things like using some lotion on your hands and face after cleaning the house, wearing comfortable but
fashionable shoes, soaking in a bathtub instead of taking a shower, even wearing sunglasses in bright light are
all little things that are kind to your body. Remember to thank your body for doing its many jobs, like having teeth
to bite food, and for having coordination that allows you to drive a car.
Step 3: Say "Yes" to feeling good.
Your spirit requires joy. Stop for 15 seconds and think of the last time you did something that made you feel joyful.
What would it take to do something that made you feel momentarily joyful every single day for a week? For a month?
For the whole year? Just imagining this you can see the positive difference it would make in your quality of life.
Step 4: Demonstrate gratitude.
Thank your creditors for allowing you to buy what you need and pay for it later. Thank your boss for starting a
company so you could be employed. Thank your best friend for loving you when you feel ugly. Thank your neighbors
for not throwing their garbage in your yard. Thank your feet for carrying you from place to place. Thank yourself for
taking some time to spread joy to others with a smile.
Without gratitude we become isolated, self-focused, and we begin to lose the value of community. Community is not
just the people who live or work near you. Community is made up of the people you give your time to, and who give
their time back to you. Be grateful that there are others who make your life as you live it, possible.
Step 5: Listen to yourself.
Besides listening to your body's subtle cues about what it needs to be well, listen to the words that you say. Try
hearing without interpreting. Your body may say it is thirsty. It did not say it was thirsty for a carbonated soft drink.
That was your interpretation. Listen again. What did your body actually tell you?
If you listen carefully to the words you say, are you telling others what they need to hear to understand, or are you
interpreting the situation and thereby changing it? If you speak truthfully about your needs (which are different
from your desires) you are far more likely to get what you need. Every word you speak has either a positive or a
negative effect. You form energy patterns with the way you use words. Which pattern are you using, and how is it
affecting your life?